5年的友情
以后会变得什么样
别要问我
时间到,自然会揭晓
明年再见
不要轻易答应
明天的事, 我也不晓
今天的难关
我还没时间管
明天的事
我不想想
Sunday, July 12, 2015
Thursday, May 31, 2012
1 more
1 more year to graduation.
1 more year till i can finally hit the 'restart' button.
1 more year to freedom.
1 more year till i can finally start afresh.
1 more year to the greatest opportunity for me to decide my life.
1 more year to perhaps the last chance for me to decide my life.
1 more year.
1 more year till i can finally hit the 'restart' button.
1 more year to freedom.
1 more year till i can finally start afresh.
1 more year to the greatest opportunity for me to decide my life.
1 more year to perhaps the last chance for me to decide my life.
1 more year.
Sunday, May 6, 2012
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Contextual
Imagine this.
Its a lazy weekend. The weather is great, sunny with a refreshing breeze. You are waiting for at the busstop, on your way to meet your childhood friends. Your music player is on shuffle and your favorite song comes on. You get into the groove, enjoying the music. On the road, a opened convertible stops at the red light, in front of the busstop you are at. You look at the young, charasmatic driver who is doing a slight dance with his shoulder, enjoying the music on his stereo. Just as you realised that you too was dancing to your favorite music, the driver turns over and catches your eyes. The both of you blush with the sudden realisation that you were both dancing in the streets. He reveals a shy smile before the traffic lights turn green, and he drives off.
How would u react, and what would you be thinking?
Now, imagine this.
Its a lazy weekend. The weather is great, sunny with a refreshing breeze. You are waiting for at the busstop, on your way to meet your childhood friends. Your music player is on shuffle and your favorite song comes on. You get into the groove, enjoying the music. On the road, an aging, scratched up sedan with dents stops at the red light, in front of the busstop you are at. You look at the balding middle-age driver who is doing a slight dance with his shoulder, enjoying the music on his stereo. Just as you realised that you too was dancing to your favorite music, the driver turns over and catches your eyes. The both of you blush with the sudden realisation that you were both dancing in the streets. He reveals a shy smile before the traffic lights turn green, and he drives off.
Now, how would you react, and what would you be thinking.
Its a lazy weekend. The weather is great, sunny with a refreshing breeze. You are waiting for at the busstop, on your way to meet your childhood friends. Your music player is on shuffle and your favorite song comes on. You get into the groove, enjoying the music. On the road, a opened convertible stops at the red light, in front of the busstop you are at. You look at the young, charasmatic driver who is doing a slight dance with his shoulder, enjoying the music on his stereo. Just as you realised that you too was dancing to your favorite music, the driver turns over and catches your eyes. The both of you blush with the sudden realisation that you were both dancing in the streets. He reveals a shy smile before the traffic lights turn green, and he drives off.
How would u react, and what would you be thinking?
Now, imagine this.
Its a lazy weekend. The weather is great, sunny with a refreshing breeze. You are waiting for at the busstop, on your way to meet your childhood friends. Your music player is on shuffle and your favorite song comes on. You get into the groove, enjoying the music. On the road, an aging, scratched up sedan with dents stops at the red light, in front of the busstop you are at. You look at the balding middle-age driver who is doing a slight dance with his shoulder, enjoying the music on his stereo. Just as you realised that you too was dancing to your favorite music, the driver turns over and catches your eyes. The both of you blush with the sudden realisation that you were both dancing in the streets. He reveals a shy smile before the traffic lights turn green, and he drives off.
Now, how would you react, and what would you be thinking.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Crying doesnt solve anything, but it helps to lossen the 'cap' and to release the pressure.
He read the legal letter over again for far too many times. So much so that his eyes knew where the keywords of the letter were located. 'Divorce', 'separation', 'appointment', 'signature' and 'contract' were some of them.
The appointment was on next week. The cold war felt like it had gone on for far too long. Everything seem to have stemmed from the death of their 2year old son, just 2 weeks ago. He had his head buried in work and didnt make it in time to fetch Jim. A speeding car took Jim away from him forever. Noone knew what happened, everyone saw the aftermath. Everyone wanted answers, he had none. He was overwhelmed with guilt, and his wife made him felt twice as bad, she blamed it on him. He thought it was just going to be a tough phrase that they could make it through together. He thought their bond and trust was strong. He was wrong. She hated him from the incident on.
The day after Jim.s death, she moved out. The day of the funeral,he was rejected entry. 2 weeks after Jim.s death, this letter arrived.
There wasnt even a chance to talk. To ask for forgiveness. To apologise.
There wasnt anyone to share his grief, to comfort him. Just the walls of the empty house to echo the emptyness he felt.
The appointment was on next week. He wasnt even sure if he would get another chance to meet her. He wasnt even sure if he wanted to.
He read the letter again, allowing it to soak in. Everything that had happened over the past the 2 weeks replayed in his head over again and over again. As it start to dawn on him that it was all going to be over next week, the first trace of tears started to swell in his eyes. The first trace of tears in 2 weeks. The first physical manifestation of grief, guilt and perhaps, relieve.
He read the legal letter over again for far too many times. So much so that his eyes knew where the keywords of the letter were located. 'Divorce', 'separation', 'appointment', 'signature' and 'contract' were some of them.
The appointment was on next week. The cold war felt like it had gone on for far too long. Everything seem to have stemmed from the death of their 2year old son, just 2 weeks ago. He had his head buried in work and didnt make it in time to fetch Jim. A speeding car took Jim away from him forever. Noone knew what happened, everyone saw the aftermath. Everyone wanted answers, he had none. He was overwhelmed with guilt, and his wife made him felt twice as bad, she blamed it on him. He thought it was just going to be a tough phrase that they could make it through together. He thought their bond and trust was strong. He was wrong. She hated him from the incident on.
The day after Jim.s death, she moved out. The day of the funeral,he was rejected entry. 2 weeks after Jim.s death, this letter arrived.
There wasnt even a chance to talk. To ask for forgiveness. To apologise.
There wasnt anyone to share his grief, to comfort him. Just the walls of the empty house to echo the emptyness he felt.
The appointment was on next week. He wasnt even sure if he would get another chance to meet her. He wasnt even sure if he wanted to.
He read the letter again, allowing it to soak in. Everything that had happened over the past the 2 weeks replayed in his head over again and over again. As it start to dawn on him that it was all going to be over next week, the first trace of tears started to swell in his eyes. The first trace of tears in 2 weeks. The first physical manifestation of grief, guilt and perhaps, relieve.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
just a thought- choice
'everyone can choose to do what they want', or can they?
on what basis do we allow ourselves to make decisions? what allows us to decide which decision is right, or to put down and dismiss some options?
fear? psychology? or society?
on what basis do we allow ourselves to make decisions? what allows us to decide which decision is right, or to put down and dismiss some options?
fear? psychology? or society?
Monday, December 12, 2011
agile monkey
(awesome artwork by aungye :D)
the pear on the orange tree
looking ever so sweet
the agile monkey makes a dash
only to end up in rage.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Is it right to blame luck for the action of man?
'Bang!'
As gunpowder filled the air, he felt the bullet landing on his skin. A chilly tinge of sharpness drilled through his skin. Strangly,there was no pain. Just a plain, dull sharpness entering, digging deeper into him. There was no dramatic, blood splashing. Just a slow steady stream of blood, flowing out from where the bullet has entered.
How did he get himself into this? He remembered hearing a loud scream when he stepped out of the elevator just seconds ago. Soon, he found hinself fighting off this unshaven, 1.8m tall bloke. It seemed like he was attempting to rob the person whom the scream belonged to. Why did he step in, he doesnt know. The bloke didnt seem so dangerous until he had whipped out the gun.
Damn.
He had always thought he could dodge a bullet. Even though he have never been trained before. Well, he did exercise regularly and was pretty sure he was fit. At least fitter than those of his age. Ha! They make it look so easy in the movies.
He didnt expect time to slow down the moment the guy pulled the trigger. But he had always thought that he was nimble enough to jump out of danger. Over-confidence, is trouble.
Should he blame it on his luck? Or, should he blame it on himself? If he hadnt stepped in, it wouldnt be him lying here. Perhaps, if he hadnt stepped in, noone would be hurt? The man would have gotten away with his loot, and the screamer would have only lost some cash. Was all the heroics really worth it?
The screaming resumed. He assumed that this time it was because of the blood instead. The bloke had ran off, leaving the gun at the scene. Not very clever, he thought. He had looked shock after firing the gun. That definitely wasnt part of the plan.
By now, his legs had given way and he was slumped on the ground. The screaming had gotter higher and louder, leaving his ears ringing as he stared at the gun that led to his current situation.
Soon, he became weary. He realised that the bullet seemed to have stopped moving, although he didnt know when or where. All that was left in place of the sharp sensation, was a throbbing pulse. He closed his eyes, hoping that he would wake up and find himself in a hospital.
As gunpowder filled the air, he felt the bullet landing on his skin. A chilly tinge of sharpness drilled through his skin. Strangly,there was no pain. Just a plain, dull sharpness entering, digging deeper into him. There was no dramatic, blood splashing. Just a slow steady stream of blood, flowing out from where the bullet has entered.
How did he get himself into this? He remembered hearing a loud scream when he stepped out of the elevator just seconds ago. Soon, he found hinself fighting off this unshaven, 1.8m tall bloke. It seemed like he was attempting to rob the person whom the scream belonged to. Why did he step in, he doesnt know. The bloke didnt seem so dangerous until he had whipped out the gun.
Damn.
He had always thought he could dodge a bullet. Even though he have never been trained before. Well, he did exercise regularly and was pretty sure he was fit. At least fitter than those of his age. Ha! They make it look so easy in the movies.
He didnt expect time to slow down the moment the guy pulled the trigger. But he had always thought that he was nimble enough to jump out of danger. Over-confidence, is trouble.
Should he blame it on his luck? Or, should he blame it on himself? If he hadnt stepped in, it wouldnt be him lying here. Perhaps, if he hadnt stepped in, noone would be hurt? The man would have gotten away with his loot, and the screamer would have only lost some cash. Was all the heroics really worth it?
The screaming resumed. He assumed that this time it was because of the blood instead. The bloke had ran off, leaving the gun at the scene. Not very clever, he thought. He had looked shock after firing the gun. That definitely wasnt part of the plan.
By now, his legs had given way and he was slumped on the ground. The screaming had gotter higher and louder, leaving his ears ringing as he stared at the gun that led to his current situation.
Soon, he became weary. He realised that the bullet seemed to have stopped moving, although he didnt know when or where. All that was left in place of the sharp sensation, was a throbbing pulse. He closed his eyes, hoping that he would wake up and find himself in a hospital.
Sunday, December 4, 2011
to be continued...?
Theirs was a marriage of convenience.
They both had something they wanted out of it.
She, a citizenship. Him, a property.
The terms and conditions:
He was to come up with the cash for the property.
They were to provide for themselves.
She was not to ask for any payment or compensation after the deal.
The dateline was 5 years.
Today marks the fifth year.
------------
She wanted a citizenship and he wanted a property, and life away from the family.
Due to unfortunate circumstances and a twist of fate, she ended living in his property, paying a mediocre rent.
His was a small apartment with 2 rooms and a walkway which he insisted was a 'hall'. It had barely enough room for two to
manoeuvre once he squeezed the tele and couch.
Whenever his parents, her 'in-laws' were over, the apartment would seem to shrink. She had always assumed that it was his way of deterring
them.
She would always be forced to squeeze with them on the two-seater couch, for what they called 'conversations'. It was always more of a one
way interrogation and blackmail session as the 'in-laws' tried to educate her on the ways of being a wife.
These werent on their contract, but she had became accustomed to such sessions, at times finding herself looking forward to them. It
suddenly dawned on her that she could have confronted him for payment for these sessions. As to why she did not, she had no idea.
All these memories hit her as she made her way to the law firm.
Perhaps this is what people often described as the 'dying moments of one's life', having memories 'flash pass your eyes'.
Except, perhaps this was the death of her 'marriage'.
Today was the day.
He suggested that they find their own way to the lawyer's. She agreed. Travelling together would be too awkward anyway.
As the agreed time to drew nearer, she started to feel a tinge of sadness, perhaps an unwillingness to sign the papers. They had both longed for this day. But emotions interferred along the way.
It would only be her wishful thinking anyway. He never showed any strong emotions,and she had never been able to find out how he felt about her. He probably didnt care less since he already gotten what he wanted from the deal. Sometimes, she would blame herself for being unable
to resist such emotions. They have had great moments, but it was never long before they were reminded of the contract.
Maybe it was only because she had become accustomed to the current life style. Perhaps such emotions would fade after she gets used to her new lifestyle. Such thoughts always calms her down. Perhaps it was the fear of not knowing what this new freedom and future holds, that gave
rise to the sadness and anxiousness she had been dealing with for the past few days. Last night was the peak, all the emotions had piled up, she had cried herself to sleep.
10.50am. On the dot. She put on the sunglasses to hide her puffy eyes and alighted from the cab.
He was already standing at the foot of the building.
As she walked towards him, he turned around his head around, with eyebrows stiched closely together, and a hugh pair of sunglasses covering his eyes.
They both had something they wanted out of it.
She, a citizenship. Him, a property.
The terms and conditions:
He was to come up with the cash for the property.
They were to provide for themselves.
She was not to ask for any payment or compensation after the deal.
The dateline was 5 years.
Today marks the fifth year.
------------
She wanted a citizenship and he wanted a property, and life away from the family.
Due to unfortunate circumstances and a twist of fate, she ended living in his property, paying a mediocre rent.
His was a small apartment with 2 rooms and a walkway which he insisted was a 'hall'. It had barely enough room for two to
manoeuvre once he squeezed the tele and couch.
Whenever his parents, her 'in-laws' were over, the apartment would seem to shrink. She had always assumed that it was his way of deterring
them.
She would always be forced to squeeze with them on the two-seater couch, for what they called 'conversations'. It was always more of a one
way interrogation and blackmail session as the 'in-laws' tried to educate her on the ways of being a wife.
These werent on their contract, but she had became accustomed to such sessions, at times finding herself looking forward to them. It
suddenly dawned on her that she could have confronted him for payment for these sessions. As to why she did not, she had no idea.
All these memories hit her as she made her way to the law firm.
Perhaps this is what people often described as the 'dying moments of one's life', having memories 'flash pass your eyes'.
Except, perhaps this was the death of her 'marriage'.
Today was the day.
He suggested that they find their own way to the lawyer's. She agreed. Travelling together would be too awkward anyway.
As the agreed time to drew nearer, she started to feel a tinge of sadness, perhaps an unwillingness to sign the papers. They had both longed for this day. But emotions interferred along the way.
It would only be her wishful thinking anyway. He never showed any strong emotions,and she had never been able to find out how he felt about her. He probably didnt care less since he already gotten what he wanted from the deal. Sometimes, she would blame herself for being unable
to resist such emotions. They have had great moments, but it was never long before they were reminded of the contract.
Maybe it was only because she had become accustomed to the current life style. Perhaps such emotions would fade after she gets used to her new lifestyle. Such thoughts always calms her down. Perhaps it was the fear of not knowing what this new freedom and future holds, that gave
rise to the sadness and anxiousness she had been dealing with for the past few days. Last night was the peak, all the emotions had piled up, she had cried herself to sleep.
10.50am. On the dot. She put on the sunglasses to hide her puffy eyes and alighted from the cab.
He was already standing at the foot of the building.
As she walked towards him, he turned around his head around, with eyebrows stiched closely together, and a hugh pair of sunglasses covering his eyes.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
...
'Vroom!'
A car sped past just a few inches from her.
She stopped on her tracks as images and memories rushed to invade her mind, colonising her visual view of the street she was standing at.Soon her senses were over-ridden. She felt like she was back at the night race. The very race that he had begged her to flag off. His very last race.
She could hear the rowdy crowd, cheering their side, jeering her's. The air was moist, like it always is after a heavy rainpour. The lights were blinding, illuminating the cars which shone under their thick polish. The drivers were rived up and ready to go, shouting insults and jeering the crowd. Noise from the reving cars was uncoordinated, impatient.
She was standing next to his machine, wishing him luck. Underground racing was tough, and dangerous. Skills no longer matter where luck plays a greater role.
Guys from the sidelines signalled, it was the flag off.
The airhorn was sounded, initiating a louder cheer from the crowd. She raised the flags in her hands and brought then down to her side as the horn sounded.
The cars sprang to life, dashing forward like they needed the toilet.
His car was the few at the back, the spot which he had diligently fought for.
She smiled at him as he sped passed her, leaving her a smirk from the side mirror.
At the very same second. His car went up in flames. His very last race had ended. And they had lost everything.
A car sped past just a few inches from her.
She stopped on her tracks as images and memories rushed to invade her mind, colonising her visual view of the street she was standing at.Soon her senses were over-ridden. She felt like she was back at the night race. The very race that he had begged her to flag off. His very last race.
She could hear the rowdy crowd, cheering their side, jeering her's. The air was moist, like it always is after a heavy rainpour. The lights were blinding, illuminating the cars which shone under their thick polish. The drivers were rived up and ready to go, shouting insults and jeering the crowd. Noise from the reving cars was uncoordinated, impatient.
She was standing next to his machine, wishing him luck. Underground racing was tough, and dangerous. Skills no longer matter where luck plays a greater role.
Guys from the sidelines signalled, it was the flag off.
The airhorn was sounded, initiating a louder cheer from the crowd. She raised the flags in her hands and brought then down to her side as the horn sounded.
The cars sprang to life, dashing forward like they needed the toilet.
His car was the few at the back, the spot which he had diligently fought for.
She smiled at him as he sped passed her, leaving her a smirk from the side mirror.
At the very same second. His car went up in flames. His very last race had ended. And they had lost everything.
Sunday, October 30, 2011
away
'Come on! stand up!' he growled in a drunken slur.
'who'd you want to protect again?'
'HA! arent you 30 years too early?'
'that will teach you! thats what you get for trying to stand up against me'
He turned away and limbed into the room.
"no..!" James tried to scream, but all he could get out was a wheezing gasp.
"mom's in there, i gotta get to her!" He struggled to get up, but lifting his arms was the best he could do.
The man, his dad, had threw a punch right into his chest. And now all his body was numb.
He was supposed to protect his mom, but there wasnt much of a chance.
Tears filled his eyes as he watched the round man limb his way into the room.
'Marge! Come out! I've got to teach you how to educate the son? Come out now!' The man yelled at the top of his voice.
However, there was no response. Not even movement, from the room.
The man limbed into the room angrily, using whatever he could grab onto for suppport on the way.
Picture frames cracked as they fell onto the ground, and the chairs landed heavily onto the tiles as the man swept them from his path.
James watch helplessly as the man disappeared into the door frame.
'God, please help her if you can hear me' James plead.
As the man rummaged through the room, a figure at the front door caught James' eyes.
"Mom!" James tried to call out, but failed.
She waved at him, looking apologetic.
'Sorry, stay safe.' James felt his heart sink as he read her lips.
He could only stare on at the empty door way, as her shadow slipped away, while the monster reappeared from the room.
'who'd you want to protect again?'
'HA! arent you 30 years too early?'
'that will teach you! thats what you get for trying to stand up against me'
He turned away and limbed into the room.
"no..!" James tried to scream, but all he could get out was a wheezing gasp.
"mom's in there, i gotta get to her!" He struggled to get up, but lifting his arms was the best he could do.
The man, his dad, had threw a punch right into his chest. And now all his body was numb.
He was supposed to protect his mom, but there wasnt much of a chance.
Tears filled his eyes as he watched the round man limb his way into the room.
'Marge! Come out! I've got to teach you how to educate the son? Come out now!' The man yelled at the top of his voice.
However, there was no response. Not even movement, from the room.
The man limbed into the room angrily, using whatever he could grab onto for suppport on the way.
Picture frames cracked as they fell onto the ground, and the chairs landed heavily onto the tiles as the man swept them from his path.
James watch helplessly as the man disappeared into the door frame.
'God, please help her if you can hear me' James plead.
As the man rummaged through the room, a figure at the front door caught James' eyes.
"Mom!" James tried to call out, but failed.
She waved at him, looking apologetic.
'Sorry, stay safe.' James felt his heart sink as he read her lips.
He could only stare on at the empty door way, as her shadow slipped away, while the monster reappeared from the room.
Friday, September 23, 2011
overbearing
everyday
new emotions arise
everyday
im learning to deal with them
while maintaining the distance
like a boat in the open sea
calm and drifting into the unknown
why'd you have to come along and rock my boat
now im starting to wonder where this boat is heading
no matter how i try to keep my cool
i cant speak to you at ease
so i have become satisfied to just looking at you, in ur element.
あまり かっこいい な 友達 が ありません から
forgive for being in this state
my life has been like a boat in the open sea
calm and drifting along into the unknown
why'd you have to come along and rock my boat
now im starting to wonder where this boat is heading
and now i find myself looking for ur sillolette in the passing
stream of cars
although i know i.ll probably be disappointed
i find myself wondering
how should i react if i spot u
(my life has been)like a boat in the open sea
(i was) calm and drifting (along)into the unknown
why'd you have to come along and rock my boat
now im starting to wonder where this boat is heading
new emotions arise
everyday
im learning to deal with them
while maintaining the distance
like a boat in the open sea
calm and drifting into the unknown
why'd you have to come along and rock my boat
now im starting to wonder where this boat is heading
no matter how i try to keep my cool
i cant speak to you at ease
so i have become satisfied to just looking at you, in ur element.
あまり かっこいい な 友達 が ありません から
forgive for being in this state
my life has been like a boat in the open sea
calm and drifting along into the unknown
why'd you have to come along and rock my boat
now im starting to wonder where this boat is heading
and now i find myself looking for ur sillolette in the passing
stream of cars
although i know i.ll probably be disappointed
i find myself wondering
how should i react if i spot u
(my life has been)like a boat in the open sea
(i was) calm and drifting (along)into the unknown
why'd you have to come along and rock my boat
now im starting to wonder where this boat is heading
Saturday, June 18, 2011
train rides
weary after a day's work,
they sized themselves up,
getting ready for the last battle of the day,
as the doors slide open.
they sized themselves up,
getting ready for the last battle of the day,
as the doors slide open.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
reality?
He heaved a sigh, dropped his bag down and sank into his seat at his table, hoping that the 'travel anxiety' would pass quickly.
The morning had been crazy, as usual.
The moment he stepped into the bus, traffic had been slow and he had been pushed about in the bus by probably a million grumpy commuters as people struggled to board and exit the bus.
He flipped through his schedule book.
It has been a practice of his to note down his schedule for the day the night before. Looking at a packed day gave him a strange sense of satisfaction. Today, was such a day.
'Meeting with the uppers at 8am, followed by a conference with the international partners...'
There were to be eight of such meetings.
He double checked the documents on his table. He preferred to prepare such paperwork the day before, but last minute changes were not within his control.
Thankfully, there were no such changes today.
He arranged the documents, stood up and walked over to the resource room where he would make copies of the documents and prepare the beverages for the first meeting of the day.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
cornered
As the world gets smaller.
Our minds become narrower
be careful of what you say, for its no longer just your fellow countrymen who will judge you
different people, different cultures
be careful of what you do,
for the world will see.
Our minds become narrower
be careful of what you say, for its no longer just your fellow countrymen who will judge you
different people, different cultures
be careful of what you do,
for the world will see.
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